![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Stupid ass argument
Jan. 29th, 2006 07:23 pmso every year, john lets his mom know what we want for christmas, but he inevitably buys and wraps it all because the only national chain they have is wal-mart and she hates shopping there because it's so busy. we would then proceed to bring all these wrapped presents with us, open them, and bring them home. this was our year to stay here for christmas, though, and john decided to just suggest sending money.
so she sent us money that she earmarked we use for replacing the stove like we've been planning since we moved in. not fun, but that's nice anyway. then she informed us that she was sending something that she ordered, but it was on back order.
we finally got it last week. it was a gigantic spinny cd rack. and we really can't use it. it can't go against the wall or anything and there's nowhere that would work with us sticking it smack in the middle of an open space. and we can't possibly return it because the shipping cost to send it back would be outrageous.
so john thanked her, but also tried to tactfully let her know that in the future it would be better for her to check with us before purchasing such a large and expensive present like that. don't think she took it all that well.
here's the thing about john's mom. she has a textbook case of obsessive compulsive personality disorder. i diagnosed her, but john has read the criteria and agrees 100%. don't confuse this with OCD, washing hands and counting and all that. this is a personality disorder that is all about control and rigidity, type A anal retentive gone crazy. but along with that, comes hording. not entirely sure why, but people with this disorder cannot throw things away. not about sentimentality. not about practicality. just gotta keep everything. can't help themselves. you would not believe the hording of this woman. so much stuff accumulated that no one has any use for. it has caused problems with her in-laws because she took a bunch of her father-in-law's stuff after he died and it's just collecting dust with everything else.
she's given john things that she has told him she wants back if he didn't want them anymore. and i mean, we're talking about total crap. we haven't told her of some things we've sold at our annual garage sale. so when john let her know we really couldn't use the cd rack, she told him she'd take it. for what, i have no idea. she doesn't really have cds or dvds. she definitely doesn't have space for it. it will likely stay in its box, collecting dust with everything else.
so i suggested something useful to do with it. our family mechanic, who is really also a friend of my dad's, has some major bills to pay. his wife died of cancer recently and being self-employed, he didn't exactly have health insurance. so the sportsman's club is having a benefit to help him out. he's always been good to us and he's always taken care of me whether i was bringing in my crap escort or mike's abused buick. i'd really like to donate the cd rack to the benefit. it makes so much more sense to me than just letting it sit around doing nothing, and contributing to my mother-in-law's disorder.
no dice. john is refusing, on the grounds that it will just cause a bunch of shit with his mom. i tried to point out that it was a gift and technically it is ours to do with as we like. i don't seem to have an equal say in the matter, though, and he won't say no to his mom because he doesn't want to get into it with her. i'm having a very difficult time respecting that reasoning.
so she sent us money that she earmarked we use for replacing the stove like we've been planning since we moved in. not fun, but that's nice anyway. then she informed us that she was sending something that she ordered, but it was on back order.
we finally got it last week. it was a gigantic spinny cd rack. and we really can't use it. it can't go against the wall or anything and there's nowhere that would work with us sticking it smack in the middle of an open space. and we can't possibly return it because the shipping cost to send it back would be outrageous.
so john thanked her, but also tried to tactfully let her know that in the future it would be better for her to check with us before purchasing such a large and expensive present like that. don't think she took it all that well.
here's the thing about john's mom. she has a textbook case of obsessive compulsive personality disorder. i diagnosed her, but john has read the criteria and agrees 100%. don't confuse this with OCD, washing hands and counting and all that. this is a personality disorder that is all about control and rigidity, type A anal retentive gone crazy. but along with that, comes hording. not entirely sure why, but people with this disorder cannot throw things away. not about sentimentality. not about practicality. just gotta keep everything. can't help themselves. you would not believe the hording of this woman. so much stuff accumulated that no one has any use for. it has caused problems with her in-laws because she took a bunch of her father-in-law's stuff after he died and it's just collecting dust with everything else.
she's given john things that she has told him she wants back if he didn't want them anymore. and i mean, we're talking about total crap. we haven't told her of some things we've sold at our annual garage sale. so when john let her know we really couldn't use the cd rack, she told him she'd take it. for what, i have no idea. she doesn't really have cds or dvds. she definitely doesn't have space for it. it will likely stay in its box, collecting dust with everything else.
so i suggested something useful to do with it. our family mechanic, who is really also a friend of my dad's, has some major bills to pay. his wife died of cancer recently and being self-employed, he didn't exactly have health insurance. so the sportsman's club is having a benefit to help him out. he's always been good to us and he's always taken care of me whether i was bringing in my crap escort or mike's abused buick. i'd really like to donate the cd rack to the benefit. it makes so much more sense to me than just letting it sit around doing nothing, and contributing to my mother-in-law's disorder.
no dice. john is refusing, on the grounds that it will just cause a bunch of shit with his mom. i tried to point out that it was a gift and technically it is ours to do with as we like. i don't seem to have an equal say in the matter, though, and he won't say no to his mom because he doesn't want to get into it with her. i'm having a very difficult time respecting that reasoning.
